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Brenda's Journey

November 13, 2017

We all have very different stories to share - each unique in it's own way. This is Brenda's story........

 

 

I want to thank Adoption Reunion Search & Support and it’s creator, Cathy.  She is most certainly the Angel that has guided me here.


With my angels help over the past 15 months, I now have a family tree, I have discovered my nationality, my medical history, my birth relatives on both my maternal and paternal sides, as well as finding my birth father, and 3 half siblings! Although it was a very emotional Journey, it was so worth it. It has added so much to my life. I could not be more grateful for the Search Angels, thank you for all of the days you devoted to my search.


You would think that the first 46 years of my life would be the biggest part of My story. but because of the relationships over this past year of my search have brought me answers to lifelong questions, it is biggest part of My journey.


I was placed for adoption 48 years ago, by my birth mother, across the country from where I was conceived and from where my birth father was then and still is today. I can only speculate as to why, but I have been assured by my birth father that he was unaware I existed.


In 1969 I was adopted into a home.... that I believe started out as a loving home, to a couple who had lost children of their own through miscarriage, and there were more after I was adopted.


Depression from the loss of children was followed by alcoholism, which is often caused by trying to cover or numb pain one can't ‘Let Go’ of.  I know the struggle is real. I'd like to believe that we all do our best. The best that we know how in the moment and when we grow to know better, we do better.  I've most always been able to see the good in people. I feel I've given people chances over and over,  to prove that they can be better, unfortunately sometimes to the point where it's caused me more harm and suffering then I should have allowed to happen. 


As a child I was abused in several ways  by several people. When I was old enough to run away from it, I did!  I was labeled a 'runaway' at 13 and was removed from my adopted home and became a ward of the state, meaning the Courts would put me wherever there was room for me. I never fit in anywhere and I could never truly answer the question of where I came from.  I ran away from foster homes and group homes, all of the ones that I could, but was forced to stay in several different centers that I could not escape.  It was those centers that actually helped me. The ones t